It's never boring with ACDs
At cattledog.com there is a listserve for us crazy cattle dog people.
Once in a while there will be a theme proposed to elicit stories. This one was called "Demolition lists" Don't let the stories scare you away if you are interested in an ACD, just use them as warnings. 
Thanks to the contributors.
Thanks to the contributors.Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 14:10:49 -0700
From: Brandy
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time!
I am afraid it is my year to win -
I sold my home and had not yet found a new one, so my children and I moved in with my ex husband. The animals and I in the 2 bdrm basement, my kids and ex upstairs.
This was an iffy prospect as my ex is from the old school of beat your animals into submission, this caused some tension and the dogs although never having been touched by him are very leery of him (wonder if they sense that from me). He had company over that didn't like dogs - in my home they would have dealt with it - in his home he put them in their bedroom and closed the door.
Curtains, Walls, Carpet,2x4 studs, 4x4 studs, ceiling, ceiling mounted heat ducts (don't know don't
ask) 2x4 studs - yea in a manner of hours they had destroyed the entire room - not just one wall or one corner but the ENTIRE room ~ and they did it in silence.
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 15:15:22 -0600
From: Darlene
From: Brandy
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time!
I am afraid it is my year to win -
I sold my home and had not yet found a new one, so my children and I moved in with my ex husband. The animals and I in the 2 bdrm basement, my kids and ex upstairs.
This was an iffy prospect as my ex is from the old school of beat your animals into submission, this caused some tension and the dogs although never having been touched by him are very leery of him (wonder if they sense that from me). He had company over that didn't like dogs - in my home they would have dealt with it - in his home he put them in their bedroom and closed the door.
Curtains, Walls, Carpet,2x4 studs, 4x4 studs, ceiling, ceiling mounted heat ducts (don't know don't
ask) 2x4 studs - yea in a manner of hours they had destroyed the entire room - not just one wall or one corner but the ENTIRE room ~ and they did it in silence.
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 15:15:22 -0600
From: Darlene
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time!
When my dogs were puppies they chewed the corners off my coffee table and piano bench and chewed the cords on my massaging lounge chair (and I could really use the massage now). Annie ruined my carpet during the years after getting upset by another dog, then she and Blue ruined the water bed, which in turn ruined a hardwood floor, the ceiling downstairs, and whatever was in boxes under that room. I haven't gone through those boxes yet to see what all got ruined. I don't care. I'll round off the corners of the furniture sometime.
Blue, Venture and Patty also dug up my aunt's lily bulbs when we were in St. Louis after the specialty there and Blue cut the roses off the bushes when he ran by them. Fun way to get your exercise at the aunt's house.
Darlene
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 16:19:42 -0500
From: Mary H H
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time!
Neil P wrote:
>.... How much damage has your dog done over the years? Or blatant
>thievery by counter-surfing?
I'll play.
I don't mind the blatant theivery (and if I did, I'd *do* something about it). I don't even mind finding the everyday dishes, apparently spotless, lounging around on the sofas or hiding behind the loveseat. I confess a small quantity of irritation when Someone (a large, black, somewhat Lab-ish Someone who answers to the name of
"Duke") chewed all the non-stick coating off the only (previously) decent frying pan, but I spend most of my life in varying degrees of irritation, so even that wasn't a Big Deal.
I draw the line at arson.
Ranger is blameless, hard to believe as that is. He was with me, in class. My roommate stopped by the house on her way to pick us up from class (she worries about me walking home past the bars at night with an apparently cute / harmless dog like Ranger), and smelled burning paper. Upon investigation, a Certain Canine Someone knocked a small lamp onto the newspapers on my one (previously) good table. The shade was off, and the bare incandescent bulb was merrily combusting the snot out of the Des Moines Register business section.
(This might actually be a good use for Snappy Trainers -- Duke's about as sensitive as comatose granite to anything short of grievous bodily harm. But it's easier to just make sure that lamp's off when I leave the house.)
When I got home, I found not only the newspaper with a black/brown, crispy spot, but that the "spot" was melted to the plastic placemat. It, in turn, was melted onto/into the vinyl tablecloth. Which was stuck to the actual table by the remains of its scorched and melted varnish. So much for thoughts of "Antiques Roadshow" riches. I'm lucky to still have a house, and dogs to scold in it.
Mary H.
"It is an immense loss to have all robust and sustaining expletives refined away from one! At . . . moments of trial refinement is a feeble reed to lean upon."
(Alice James)
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 17:55:21 -0400
From: Erin LV
Subject: Demolition Lists...
Oh boy...what has been destroyed huh???? Well lets see here, I have lost 2 couches, yep, count 'em 2, but the ACD involved (Tyler) had some help from a wretched little Aussie/GSD mix we were fostering. Tyler himself has eaten several remotes, 2 cordless phones, 1 cell phone, 1 laptop cord, several candles, and numerous items out of the trash! Rain has been good so far, knock on wood, only eating toilet paper from the bathroom trash can. When Vixen & I lived in our townhouse, she ate an entire bookcase & about $400 worth of EMT/Paramedic textbooks! She also ate 4 e-collars, and numerous bandages when we were surviving the dreaded broken femur! I can say I have been lucky, I still have a house, boyfriend, and 2 ACDs :) I have had more damage done by my non-ACDs anyways! But on a funnier note, Vixen, who now lives with my parents, learned to open the kitchen cabinets, and now helps herself to anything her little hear desire s when my parents forget to crate her, she nev!
er did it
Erin, Tyler (The Dane told me to eat it mom), & Rain (what I am deaf???)
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 15:52:06 -0700
From: Sheila M
Subject: Destructo puppies
My favorite was Aiden, puppy from Hell. He was *the* cutest, smartest, orneriest foster I ever had. In the course of 2 weeks, he ate:
6 shoes (1 each of 6 different pairs, of course) chewed through 2 blowdryer cords (unplugged)
1 vacuum cleaner cord (unplugged)
5 or 6 paperback books
a patchwork quilt
3 Gentle Leaders (Aiden *hated* these. I sent one with him to his forever family; when I called his new mom to ask how the Gentle Leader was working, she confessed sheepishly that he'd eaten it) the blanket in his crate the plastic pan in the bottom of the crate
He was also popped the welds on the crate and escaped several times. When I finally wedged the crate in a corner, he popped the welds, stuck his head out, and chewed a hole in the wall.
He was a great dog. His forever family loves him. And he taught me a whole lot about puppyproofing a house. :-)
Sheila
and the knuckleheads
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 18:58:00 -0400
From: Tonya
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time! (long, of course)
-----Neil demonically suggested-----
>Ann Marie raised a good point, and I think it's definitely time
>again.... How much damage has your dog done over the years? Or blatant
>thievery by counter-surfing? I remember this went around a couple of
>years ago, and it was quite humorous, to say the least. And when Rosie
>was being a butt-head (most days, actually), it was nice to be reminded
>that she's definitely not the worst of the bunch for destructo-dog
>tendencies. Although, none of our Henkel knives have un-chewed handles
>anymore.
My favorite was the e-Specialty where we had a category of "Most Expensive Damage Done". I don't remember who won that particular category, but I *do* remember that Eriko's dog (was it Paige?) had managed to eat an Oriental carpet and I thought "I can't compete with that!"
We have actually managed to get off pretty light this year in terms of actual property damage caused by Hooliganism. I don't think we can count the vivisected stuffed animals since - let's face it - we bought those knowing they were a lost cause. I sometimes feel sorry for stuffed animals in my house since they're basically coming to live with us so I can throw them under the bus. Ditto the bag of socks that I now keep just for Tiger. He's not happy if he's not toting around a sock. And most of the extreme furniture damage seems to have been restricted to their puppyhood. Why, it's been weeks since anyone has eaten a pillow!
Counter surfing remains an issue. I have taken the great advice given to me on the list and hung firm through repeated arguments with my mother, my dad and Sean - they all want me to give up the giant antique microwave and invest in something newer, smaller and less likely to throw out death rays. However, since I basically use the microwave to store things that the dogs were stealing off the counter, I need the extra-big one. They don't think this argument has as much merit as I do, but that baby's staying where it is until I get a dog-proof box. So there. Since learning to store things in the microwave, our counter surfing incidents have gone way down. Of course, the holidays are fast approaching and there will once again be things carelessly left laying on the dining room tables where Elvis can do a "levitate and snatch" in under 3 seconds.
BUT! I do have a tale of destruction. Do the dogs destroying each other count in this demolition list? Because we had the Great Eye Gouging Incident. (Sean thinks this was a cry for help from Tiger, but I know that Bad Elvis did it.) Went out and left the dogs in their crates. Came home and took dogs OUT of the crates. Let the dogs into the back yard for necessary potty functions under supervision. Came upstairs with dogs. See Tiger rolling around on the quilt that it took me EIGHT MONTHS to make by hand. Actually, he's allowed to roll around on the quilt. Except this one time. Because this one time, he was using the quilt to wipe the blood off his face. Bad Tiger. (OH! That also counts for property damage!) Anyway, somewhere between "let them out" and "came upstairs" Tiger had ripped a big flap of skin off his face in a semi-circular pattern that looked suspiciously like Elvis teeth marks. It missed his eye by about an eyelash. It required a trip to the Emergency Vet, surgery (including a consult with an opthamologist), two weeks in an e-collar which ALSO led to property damage, since Tiger decided that the best thing in life was ramming things with the collar and People Damage since he wasn't shy about people being some of the things that he would ram AND having to chase him down 4 times a day to put ointment on his eye.
And that was after all the Paw Woundings.
Want to hear the best part of my week? We took the boys to the Pet Spa (it's not a kennel - it's really called the Pet Spa) last week while we were out of town. Sadly, the spa cost more than we spent on the rest of the vacation. ANYWAY, when we first started taking them there, I was extremely concerned because... well... my dogs are Bad Dogs and I didn't want to get sued when they ate someone else's angel. The spa offers a "report card" where they will tell you how the dogs reacted to their various activities (off leash romp in the woods, activity center, pool/Jacuzzi time, grooming, etc.) and how they did while they were in the kennel in general. I've been collecting them - we get a report card every time we leave the dogs. Because they all say things like "these are the greatest dogs in the history of dogdom and I hope you bring them more often!" and "Elvis is such a love bug - what a cute funny happy boy!" and "NOT VICIOUS KILLERS TRYING TO EAT THE NEIGHBORS". I mean, what are the odds that someone I'm paying is going to say something nice about my dogs?
Tonya
And the Groomed and Sleepy Hooligans
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 19:17:15 -0400
From: Tonya
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time!
Oh... HEY! I didn't know we could accumulate damage!!!
Because then I can include the brand new living room set that Elvis used to comfort himself while he was teething when I first got him. (Note to self: just because someone SAYS that a dog is 11 months old, if they're dropping their baby teeth, it's probably not true.) Also, the pattern on the new furniture (coffee table, sofa, ottoman and chair and love seat) was perfect for hiding pee stains. Until the smell wafted up. And the orthopedic inserts and leather tasseled work shoes that Tiger ate. And the vet visit immediately following the shoe-eating. And the limited edition, signed copy of one of my favorite authors that Foster DJ ate - my bad for leaving it within 6 feet of the floor. And the...
And then I saw Mary's post. I can't compete with ARSON.
I'm out of the running again.
But at least we're not kicking our neighbors and zipping our tails around like SOME weirdos.(Susan - I suggested a TRADE. You gotta take one of the hooligans in exchange for the lovely and talented Zerphyr.)
Tonya,
down to one post for the day
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 20:35:04 -0400
From: Claire
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time!
Destructo dogs? Let's see, when Lady was a "teenager" she ate/destroyed the
following:
1 twin bed (my son's)
1 brand new king-sized quilt (mine)
An unknown number of pairs of shoes (I gave up counting at around 10) An unknown number of panties (I never did start counting)
1 set of king sized sheets
oh, I know there was more, but it's been a couple years so I've forgotten....Oh, yeah, she's bitten a couple of hoses that run from the pool to the filter and back again clean through so they had to be replaced.
As a puppy, Clint had a thing for my underwear, too, and ate or destroyed an uncounted number of bras (including one I'd never worn) and panties. He is also the reason I no longer have a rose bush in the back yard, he ate that down to the roots.
2 years ago, he managed to break my hand (well, ring finger) pretty bad and I had to have surgery on it. I have 2 screws in my left ring finger, they're Phillips head, you can see it in the x-rays. Include in the medical costs the cost of having 3 rings (2 wedding rings and 1 engagement ring) fixed and resized after they'd been cut off at the ER.
Most recently, last May, when Lady was in season, he lost his mind and managed to pull a brand new dress that I'd only worn 1 time into his crate and ate about 1/3 of it. Now just how he got it in his crate I don't know, because the dress was hanging up on the closet door and it was not touching the crate. I KNOW that there was several inches between the dress and the crate.
Now Sydney, my grand dame old lady, has only eaten 2 things. 1 was the tassels off a pair of Ed's (hubby's) loafers (we figure she was making a fashion statement) and the other was the arm off a sofa that a friend gave us. Of course the friend had labs and I figure Syd didn't like the smell of the labs in her house.
I really can't blame this one on Syd, but I did trip over her once and broke my big toe. No screws in it, so the doctor bills weren't too bad.
Kelley, the old man, has recently taken to eating dirty dish towels and table cloths. He either pulls them out of the hamper or Alex (13 year-old
human) leaves them on the floor when searching for his own laundry to wash.
I have no idea how many Kelly has snacked on, but I would say he's done in at least 6 table cloths. I now buy table cloths and dish towels on a regular basis.
As far as counter surfing goes, they all do it I've lost all kinds of food, steaks, roasts, you name it, I've lost it. When she could see, Syd used to climb on the counter using the dog food containers!
Claire and company.
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 18:08:29 -0700
From: Kathleen C
Subject: Re: Demolition Lists...
Well....demolition sort of comes in two forms: intentional and unintentional.
Intentional:
Every pillow in my house in the backyard destuffed.
Three shoes chewed.
Not bad for having her almost exactly a year.
Unintentional:
In helping me keep on top of my laundry and stripping my bed for me every week she has torn three sets of sheets, two comforters and a mattress pad.
She also helps out with removing the sofa and chair covers. Two sets of those.
One ruined carpet due to bird blood (she was providing dinner.)
Replacement carpet due to squirrel blood.
The shredding things stopped when I started giving her things she could shred. She gets the empty cookie boxes and dog food bags, has a blast throwing them all over the backyard then I just mow them up. For some reason the stuffed toys I gave her to destuff she treats with great care, not so much as a chewed ear.
Kathleen
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 19:34:21 -0700
From: Ingrid R
Subject: Re: Demolition list
I can't compete with arson etc but Tessa has proven to be a pricey dog to own
1.) I collect rare and antique books. Tessa has good taste in books. In fact, such good taste in books that she ate the almost 120 years old original leather bound edition of Montana's first congressional record. I can't even think of its value without crying.
2.) Tessa has the obnoxious habit of going rabid when dogs go by her crate or the car. Usually I have a stuffed toy with her and she shoves that in her mouth when she barks at the passing dogs. Once, I forgot to put a toy in the car while she was loose in it when I was at a dog seminar. Tessa, ever resourceful, used the back of the rear seat of the car. To the tune of pulling the seat off the frame.
3.) This is sort of demolition - About 5 years ago Poe had some lameness issues and we went through a series of xrays, MRI, etc. After one such xray stints, I came home from the vet with a still woozy Poe and a bottle of Rimadyl. Poe and I are crashed in the bedroom watching TV when I realize Tessa is not with me. No, Tessa had decided to counter surf, eat through the "child" proof bottle and ingest the entire bottle of Rimadyl. So I go to the store buy a bottle of Hydrogen Peroxide and a turkey baster. Got home and did introductions. Tessa meet Turkey Baster. Turkey Baster meet Tessa's throat. After "basting" about 2 ounces of peroxide down her throat (a feat that caused such a struggle that the woozy Poe rolled off the bed and laid down in the living room to watch the show), Tessa pukes up the Rimadyl on the carpet (did I mention that it was white carpet?) and by this point she and I were both exhausted, sweaty, and none too happy. So I broke up a dog biscuit
in a bowl and mixed in some pepto bismol. She ate some of it and than I took her in the bathroom and gave her a sponge bath. When I am done I lay her down on the bed and go to find Poe. Found Poe. Asleep. In the bowl of biscuits and pepto bismol. Which has now spilled over the white carpet. Clean Poe off and put him in the bed next to Tessa and proceeded to sleep on the floor that evening.
But even with all these events I would not trade Tessa in for the Gutenburg bible ;-)
Ingrid
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 19:47:34 -0700
From: Heather W
Subject: Re: Demolition list
My bestest girl Jetta who is no longer w/ me...she had a stomach of steel!
She ate 4 boxes of Large Heartgard Chewable tablets (24 pills of 50-100# dog) Tried to induce vomiting..which Jetta said the hell with that- they are staying in! Nothing happened..thank goodness!
2 fresh Rhubarb/Strawberry Pies- just out of the oven..she left the bottom crust for us.
Countless of Remote Controls to the TV..I should have bought stock..
Our office manager's lunch- which were VERY hot wings..we thought Jetta ate them..but to our surprice- a few days later she came out from upstairs of the clinic with several of them. She just buried them in a safe spot for future use!
Whole batch of German Chocolate Brownies...something her breeder has never forgiven her for!....Jetta pleaded the 5th on that one..and blamed it on her voices she was hearing! This was on a way to a dog show and we stopped at a rest area...she had them gone w/in 5 minutes!
Last- Jetta had a thing w/ Buttons and Zippers.... She would chew off zippers of coats..even while hanging in a closet...she would just yank them off! Buttons too..and god forbid if I leave bait in a pocket...the holes she chewed in those!
Darn dogs!
Heather and Crew
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 20:58:07 -0600
From: Vennessa G
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time
When my dogs were puppies they chewed the corners off my coffee table and piano bench and chewed the cords on my massaging lounge chair (and I could really use the massage now). Annie ruined my carpet during the years after getting upset by another dog, then she and Blue ruined the water bed, which in turn ruined a hardwood floor, the ceiling downstairs, and whatever was in boxes under that room. I haven't gone through those boxes yet to see what all got ruined. I don't care. I'll round off the corners of the furniture sometime.
Blue, Venture and Patty also dug up my aunt's lily bulbs when we were in St. Louis after the specialty there and Blue cut the roses off the bushes when he ran by them. Fun way to get your exercise at the aunt's house.
Darlene
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 16:19:42 -0500
From: Mary H H
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time!
Neil P wrote:
>.... How much damage has your dog done over the years? Or blatant
>thievery by counter-surfing?
I'll play.
I don't mind the blatant theivery (and if I did, I'd *do* something about it). I don't even mind finding the everyday dishes, apparently spotless, lounging around on the sofas or hiding behind the loveseat. I confess a small quantity of irritation when Someone (a large, black, somewhat Lab-ish Someone who answers to the name of
"Duke") chewed all the non-stick coating off the only (previously) decent frying pan, but I spend most of my life in varying degrees of irritation, so even that wasn't a Big Deal.
I draw the line at arson.
Ranger is blameless, hard to believe as that is. He was with me, in class. My roommate stopped by the house on her way to pick us up from class (she worries about me walking home past the bars at night with an apparently cute / harmless dog like Ranger), and smelled burning paper. Upon investigation, a Certain Canine Someone knocked a small lamp onto the newspapers on my one (previously) good table. The shade was off, and the bare incandescent bulb was merrily combusting the snot out of the Des Moines Register business section.
(This might actually be a good use for Snappy Trainers -- Duke's about as sensitive as comatose granite to anything short of grievous bodily harm. But it's easier to just make sure that lamp's off when I leave the house.)
When I got home, I found not only the newspaper with a black/brown, crispy spot, but that the "spot" was melted to the plastic placemat. It, in turn, was melted onto/into the vinyl tablecloth. Which was stuck to the actual table by the remains of its scorched and melted varnish. So much for thoughts of "Antiques Roadshow" riches
Mary H.
"It is an immense loss to have all robust and sustaining expletives refined away from one! At . . . moments of trial refinement is a feeble reed to lean upon."
(Alice James)
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 17:55:21 -0400
From: Erin LV
Subject: Demolition Lists...
Oh boy...what has been destroyed huh???? Well lets see here, I have lost 2 couches, yep, count 'em 2, but the ACD involved (Tyler) had some help from a wretched little Aussie/GSD mix we were fostering. Tyler himself has eaten several remotes, 2 cordless phones, 1 cell phone, 1 laptop cord, several candles, and numerous items out of the trash! Rain has been good so far, knock on wood, only eating toilet paper from the bathroom trash can. When Vixen & I lived in our townhouse, she ate an entire bookcase & about $400 worth of EMT/Paramedic textbooks! She also ate 4 e-collars, and numerous bandages when we were surviving the dreaded broken femur! I can say I have been lucky, I still have a house, boyfriend, and 2 ACDs :) I have had more damage done by my non-ACDs anyways! But on a funnier note, Vixen, who now lives with my parents, learned to open the kitchen cabinets, and now helps herself to anything her little hear desire s when my parents forget to crate her, she nev!
er did it
Erin, Tyler (The Dane told me to eat it mom), & Rain (what I am deaf???)
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 15:52:06 -0700
From: Sheila M
Subject: Destructo puppies
My favorite was Aiden, puppy from Hell. He was *the* cutest, smartest, orneriest foster I ever had. In the course of 2 weeks, he ate:
6 shoes (1 each of 6 different pairs, of course) chewed through 2 blowdryer cords (unplugged)
1 vacuum cleaner cord (unplugged)
5 or 6 paperback books
a patchwork quilt
3 Gentle Leaders (Aiden *hated* these. I sent one with him to his forever family; when I called his new mom to ask how the Gentle Leader was working, she confessed sheepishly that he'd eaten it) the blanket in his crate the plastic pan in the bottom of the crate
He was also popped the welds on the crate and escaped several times. When I finally wedged the crate in a corner, he popped the welds, stuck his head out, and chewed a hole in the wall.
He was a great dog. His forever family loves him. And he taught me a whole lot about puppyproofing a house. :-)
Sheila
and the knuckleheads
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 18:58:00 -0400
From: Tonya
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time! (long, of course)
-----Neil demonically suggested-----
>Ann Marie raised a good point, and I think it's definitely time
>again.... How much damage has your dog done over the years? Or blatant
>thievery by counter-surfing? I remember this went around a couple of
>years ago, and it was quite humorous, to say the least. And when Rosie
>was being a butt-head (most days, actually), it was nice to be reminded
>that she's definitely not the worst of the bunch for destructo-dog
>tendencies. Although, none of our Henkel knives have un-chewed handles
>anymore.
My favorite was the e-Specialty where we had a category of "Most Expensive Damage Done". I don't remember who won that particular category, but I *do* remember that Eriko's dog (was it Paige?) had managed to eat an Oriental carpet and I thought "I can't compete with that!"
We have actually managed to get off pretty light this year in terms of actual property damage caused by Hooliganism. I don't think we can count the vivisected stuffed animals since - let's face it - we bought those knowing they were a lost cause. I sometimes feel sorry for stuffed animals in my house since they're basically coming to live with us so I can throw them under the bus. Ditto the bag of socks that I now keep just for Tiger. He's not happy if he's not toting around a sock. And most of the extreme furniture damage seems to have been restricted to their puppyhood. Why, it's been weeks since anyone has eaten a pillow!
Counter surfing remains an issue. I have taken the great advice given to me on the list and hung firm through repeated arguments with my mother, my dad and Sean - they all want me to give up the giant antique microwave and invest in something newer, smaller and less likely to throw out death rays. However, since I basically use the microwave to store things that the dogs were stealing off the counter, I need the extra-big one. They don't think this argument has as much merit as I do, but that baby's staying where it is until I get a dog-proof box. So there. Since learning to store things in the microwave, our counter surfing incidents have gone way down. Of course, the holidays are fast approaching and there will once again be things carelessly left laying on the dining room tables where Elvis can do a "levitate and snatch" in under 3 seconds.
BUT! I do have a tale of destruction. Do the dogs destroying each other count in this demolition list? Because we had the Great Eye Gouging Incident. (Sean thinks this was a cry for help from Tiger, but I know that Bad Elvis did it.) Went out and left the dogs in their crates. Came home and took dogs OUT of the crates. Let the dogs into the back yard for necessary potty functions under supervision. Came upstairs with dogs. See Tiger rolling around on the quilt that it took me EIGHT MONTHS to make by hand. Actually, he's allowed to roll around on the quilt. Except this one time. Because this one time, he was using the quilt to wipe the blood off his face. Bad Tiger. (OH! That also counts for property damage!) Anyway, somewhere between "let them out" and "came upstairs" Tiger had ripped a big flap of skin off his face in a semi-circular pattern that looked suspiciously like Elvis teeth marks. It missed his eye by about an eyelash. It required a trip to the Emergency Vet, surgery (including a consult with an opthamologist), two weeks in an e-collar which ALSO led to property damage, since Tiger decided that the best thing in life was ramming things with the collar and People Damage since he wasn't shy about people being some of the things that he would ram AND having to chase him down 4 times a day to put ointment on his eye.
And that was after all the Paw Woundings.
Want to hear the best part of my week? We took the boys to the Pet Spa (it's not a kennel - it's really called the Pet Spa) last week while we were out of town. Sadly, the spa cost more than we spent on the rest of the vacation. ANYWAY, when we first started taking them there, I was extremely concerned because... well... my dogs are Bad Dogs and I didn't want to get sued when they ate someone else's angel. The spa offers a "report card" where they will tell you how the dogs reacted to their various activities (off leash romp in the woods, activity center, pool/Jacuzzi time, grooming, etc.) and how they did while they were in the kennel in general. I've been collecting them - we get a report card every time we leave the dogs. Because they all say things like "these are the greatest dogs in the history of dogdom and I hope you bring them more often!" and "Elvis is such a love bug - what a cute funny happy boy!" and "NOT VICIOUS KILLERS TRYING TO EAT THE NEIGHBORS". I mean, what are the odds that someone I'm paying is going to say something nice about my dogs?
Tonya
And the Groomed and Sleepy Hooligans
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 19:17:15 -0400
From: Tonya
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time!
Oh... HEY! I didn't know we could accumulate damage!!!
Because then I can include the brand new living room set that Elvis used to comfort himself while he was teething when I first got him. (Note to self: just because someone SAYS that a dog is 11 months old, if they're dropping their baby teeth, it's probably not true.) Also, the pattern on the new furniture (coffee table, sofa, ottoman and chair and love seat) was perfect for hiding pee stains. Until the smell wafted up. And the orthopedic inserts and leather tasseled work shoes that Tiger ate. And the vet visit immediately following the shoe-eating. And the limited edition, signed copy of one of my favorite authors that Foster DJ ate - my bad for leaving it within 6 feet of the floor. And the...
And then I saw Mary's post. I can't compete with ARSON.
I'm out of the running again.
But at least we're not kicking our neighbors and zipping our tails around like SOME weirdos.
Tonya,
down to one post for the day
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 20:35:04 -0400
From: Claire
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time!
Destructo dogs? Let's see, when Lady was a "teenager" she ate/destroyed the
following:
1 twin bed (my son's)
1 brand new king-sized quilt (mine)
An unknown number of pairs of shoes (I gave up counting at around 10) An unknown number of panties (I never did start counting)
1 set of king sized sheets
oh, I know there was more, but it's been a couple years so I've forgotten....Oh, yeah, she's bitten a couple of hoses that run from the pool to the filter and back again clean through so they had to be replaced.
As a puppy, Clint had a thing for my underwear, too, and ate or destroyed an uncounted number of bras (including one I'd never worn) and panties. He is also the reason I no longer have a rose bush in the back yard, he ate that down to the roots.
2 years ago, he managed to break my hand (well, ring finger) pretty bad and I had to have surgery on it. I have 2 screws in my left ring finger, they're Phillips head, you can see it in the x-rays. Include in the medical costs the cost of having 3 rings (2 wedding rings and 1 engagement ring) fixed and resized after they'd been cut off at the ER.
Most recently, last May, when Lady was in season, he lost his mind and managed to pull a brand new dress that I'd only worn 1 time into his crate and ate about 1/3 of it. Now just how he got it in his crate I don't know, because the dress was hanging up on the closet door and it was not touching the crate. I KNOW that there was several inches between the dress and the crate.
Now Sydney, my grand dame old lady, has only eaten 2 things. 1 was the tassels off a pair of Ed's (hubby's) loafers (we figure she was making a fashion statement) and the other was the arm off a sofa that a friend gave us. Of course the friend had labs and I figure Syd didn't like the smell of the labs in her house.
I really can't blame this one on Syd, but I did trip over her once and broke my big toe. No screws in it, so the doctor bills weren't too bad.
Kelley, the old man, has recently taken to eating dirty dish towels and table cloths. He either pulls them out of the hamper or Alex (13 year-old
human) leaves them on the floor when searching for his own laundry to wash.
I have no idea how many Kelly has snacked on, but I would say he's done in at least 6 table cloths. I now buy table cloths and dish towels on a regular basis.
As far as counter surfing goes, they all do it I've lost all kinds of food, steaks, roasts, you name it, I've lost it. When she could see, Syd used to climb on the counter using the dog food containers!
Claire and company.
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 18:08:29 -0700
From: Kathleen C
Subject: Re: Demolition Lists...
Well....demolition sort of comes in two forms: intentional and unintentional.
Intentional:
Every pillow in my house in the backyard destuffed.
Three shoes chewed.
Not bad for having her almost exactly a year.
Unintentional:
In helping me keep on top of my laundry and stripping my bed for me every week she has torn three sets of sheets, two comforters and a mattress pad.
She also helps out with removing the sofa and chair covers. Two sets of those.
One ruined carpet due to bird blood (she was providing dinner.)
Replacement carpet due to squirrel blood.
The shredding things stopped when I started giving her things she could shred. She gets the empty cookie boxes and dog food bags, has a blast throwing them all over the backyard then I just mow them up. For some reason the stuffed toys I gave her to destuff she treats with great care, not so much as a chewed ear.
Kathleen
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 19:34:21 -0700
From: Ingrid R
Subject: Re: Demolition list
I can't compete with arson etc but Tessa has proven to be a pricey dog to own
1.) I collect rare and antique books. Tessa has good taste in books. In fact, such good taste in books that she ate the almost 120 years old original leather bound edition of Montana's first congressional record. I can't even think of its value without crying.
2.) Tessa has the obnoxious habit of going rabid when dogs go by her crate or the car. Usually I have a stuffed toy with her and she shoves that in her mouth when she barks at the passing dogs. Once, I forgot to put a toy in the car while she was loose in it when I was at a dog seminar. Tessa, ever resourceful, used the back of the rear seat of the car. To the tune of pulling the seat off the frame.
3.) This is sort of demolition - About 5 years ago Poe had some lameness issues and we went through a series of xrays, MRI, etc. After one such xray stints, I came home from the vet with a still woozy Poe and a bottle of Rimadyl. Poe and I are crashed in the bedroom watching TV when I realize Tessa is not with me. No, Tessa had decided to counter surf, eat through the "child" proof bottle and ingest the entire bottle of Rimadyl. So I go to the store buy a bottle of Hydrogen Peroxide and a turkey baster. Got home and did introductions. Tessa meet Turkey Baster. Turkey Baster meet Tessa's throat. After "basting" about 2 ounces of peroxide down her throat (a feat that caused such a struggle that the woozy Poe rolled off the bed and laid down in the living room to watch the show), Tessa pukes up the Rimadyl on the carpet (did I mention that it was white carpet?) and by this point she and I were both exhausted, sweaty, and none too happy. So I broke up a dog biscuit
in a bowl and mixed in some pepto bismol. She ate some of it and than I took her in the bathroom and gave her a sponge bath. When I am done I lay her down on the bed and go to find Poe. Found Poe. Asleep. In the bowl of biscuits and pepto bismol. Which has now spilled over the white carpet. Clean Poe off and put him in the bed next to Tessa and proceeded to sleep on the floor that evening.
But even with all these events I would not trade Tessa in for the Gutenburg bible ;-)
Ingrid
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 19:47:34 -0700
From: Heather W
Subject: Re: Demolition list
My bestest girl Jetta who is no longer w/ me...she had a stomach of steel!
She ate 4 boxes of Large Heartgard Chewable tablets (24 pills of 50-100# dog) Tried to induce vomiting..which Jetta said the hell with that- they are staying in! Nothing happened..thank goodness!
2 fresh Rhubarb/Strawberry Pies- just out of the oven..she left the bottom crust for us.
Countless of Remote Controls to the TV..I should have bought stock..
Our office manager's lunch- which were VERY hot wings..we thought Jetta ate them..but to our surprice- a few days later she came out from upstairs of the clinic with several of them. She just buried them in a safe spot for future use!
Whole batch of German Chocolate Brownies...something her breeder has never forgiven her for!....Jetta pleaded the 5th on that one..and blamed it on her voices she was hearing! This was on a way to a dog show and we stopped at a rest area...she had them gone w/in 5 minutes!
Last- Jetta had a thing w/ Buttons and Zippers.... She would chew off zippers of coats..even while hanging in a closet...she would just yank them off! Buttons too..and god forbid if I leave bait in a pocket...the holes she chewed in those!
Darn dogs!
Heather and Crew
Date: Thu, 12 Oct 2006 20:58:07 -0600
From: Vennessa G
Subject: Re: Demolition lists -- it's time
Okay, here's Dingo's trophy list so far. I've only had him a few months...
There's still time for him to up his damage list though.
* One entire package of Bic crystal black ball-point pens and the
carpet they were sitting on when the ink leaked out
* One and a half bookshelves, (she destroyed the bottom shelf so the
weight of one collapsed on the other and toppled it)
* Most of the books in two tall bookshelves, I'm an English teacher,
so I have quite a few expense books
* Two pairs of sneakers
* Four pairs of laces
* One high heeled shoe
* One lamp chord (unplugged at the time)
* One entire lamp (wooden lamp, light bulb and shade)
* Two plastic plates
* Almost three sets of irreplaceable china when he pulled the
tablecloth off the table to get to my dinner
* Nine tropical fish (apparently they were enticing him so he went for
a swim and ate them)
* A priceless wooden bear sculpture
* My mother's rocking chair
* Two window ledges
* A large piece of drywall in the living room
* Some candles
* 1 DVD
* Three dresses
* 1 blanket
* 1 bed skirt
* 1 silk plant
* Various baseboards from around the house
* Chipped paint on a metal bed frame
* Two pillows
* A laptop chord
* And has left teeth marks on all my furniture, dresser, china hutch,
table, chairs, coffee tables and various other things
That's all I can think of now. Just wait I'm sure he'll come up with more
Vennessa & Dingo
You know, reading some of these stories reminds how (relatively) good my girls are.
posted by Trish @ 8:20 AM
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